Another day, another belly-full of blackberries soaked in dog urine.
Yes, some git left a Slimming World leaflet on my doorstep -although thinking about it, it is actually Fat Huw's doorstep too. They were obviously a little sheepish as they stuffed it in my Rigger Boot and sprinted (waddled) off without telling anyone. How rude is that? So, next time you see me, I'll be ringing a little bell as I'll have lost a couple of pounds or something (just like I did last time I had my bikini line waxed).
I held playgroup at our house yesterday, whilst the hall rennovations were on, so we had lots of little ones racing around in the wheelbarrow and slipping over in the mud. Just when I was thinking "Ah, I can do this! It works sometimes" I found a dead bird in a bucket of water. They all spotted it before it was disposed of, so I had seven fascinated children following me whilst I went and tipped it in the hedge. I gave them all a lesson about not playing near water as that is what happens and they nodded sagely and I thought I had got away with it. Then I tipped another bucket with a dead slug in it out, and then realised that the blob of mud I had poured it onto, was in fact another dead bird - but this poor thing now had a slug stuck to it as well. I expect our garden will now be the talk of lots of tea tables...
We went for a walk at about fiveish today as Charlotte was getting a little wild and needed wearing out, so we walked round the loop (again) and just when I was beginning to relax and Maude had spotted some good raspberries in the hedge, there was a giggle and I turned to see Charlotte sprinting along with her trousers and pants round her ankles and arms in the air, typically just as someone I sort of know was coming down her drive for a chat. Does anyone else really have to go through this, or is it just me?
The editing of Number Two (woof) book is coming along and I am realising what I have learnt from the professionals' opinions of Number One, as the beginning of the book is rubbish and I have now reached the bit that was written after Number One had had a professional's eye over it, and thankfully it is much better.
We are a bit skint, so I am offering to slip a person in as a character for the price of a tank of oil. Offers need to be received before Mid Sept. Perfect Christmas present for your loved one.
Lorraine.
Lorraine Jenkin is an author, journalist and blogger.
Books
