Bad backs and burnt out clutches

November 5th has happily arrived and gone - happily because perhaps Huw can stop his hilarious jokes about me preparing for bonfire night by burning out my clutch.

I now have two favourite bonfire stories - the best being my Dad's one about Axminster having a firework display for the Millenium and getting the timing thing a bit wrong - apparently for thirty seconds there was a display that rivalled the Bejing Olympic opening ceremony, with people fleeing from the scene with their empty biscuit tins and their long spills - and then nothing. Dad's mate was apparently a bit late and was faffing on the gate looking for change - and by the time he got his money sorted, they had all finished. Two thousand people left feeling rather deflated just in time for the new millenium.

My second favourite was about nearby Llanafan bonfire this year - the place where they have it is in a bit of a hollow and the thing was so damp that it would barely light. My friend went with her son and was a bit disappointed by the smouldering heap, but thought "never mind" as there were a few fireworks. However, as she drove past the next morning on her way to work, there was this beautiful orange glow coming across the valley... (bet they'll have a few tyres handy next year).

As for me, I've had a lucky few days - the first thing being that I had a spare ten minutes and thought I would phone my old school friend who I speak to about twice a year - her husband passed me over and I heard him say "Oh, that's nice, Lorraine has remembered your birthday!" The second piece of luck was that I did my back in (no, I haven't got to the lucky bit yet) and just as I was groaning in absolute agony, the door knocked and it was my friend, the nurse, who managed to rummage in our 19th centuary first aid kit and find a rather attractive truss and a couple of paracetamol.

The third piece of luck was a phone call later that night when I was lying groaning on the sofa, having just wiped Ralgex into my eye, my parents rang suggesting that they came up to stay the following day to help with the garden.

Wonderful! They came armed with spades and loppers and so I worked them like dogs whilst I limped around drinking tea and saying "ooh, my back" occasionally. If anyone would like to rent them out, they come highly recommended.

Anyway, must go, Huw is parched and I cannot bare the pressure.