Apologies to anyone who gives a monkeys that I haven't posted a blog this week, but have had an email from my publishers, Honno, saying, "If you have anything for us, get it in NOW!" So instead of sitting on a mountain top debating whether to use neithor and nor or either and or, I have been frantically trying to finish my tricky second novel. Reading it, re-writing it, losing it on my computer, losing my notes and nigh on starting it again. I reckon with a few more sleepless nights (no, I don't work all night, it's just those damn children going through a phase) I can get it all done by the weekend.
The trouble is, nothing else kicks in to allow me to do it. The floors still have enough stuff on them to make a fair meal, the blue bottles are still taking over (although I did find a rancid courgette in the veg rack today and am hoping that that might be the beginning of the end to their rein) and toast doesn't butter itself. Saying this, the builders have finished their work and the little beauties tidied up after themselves so well, that the house has never looked so good. I am hoping that there is a leak in their plumbing so that I can legitimately ask them to come back, perhaps after the weekend…
But the good thing is that I had an email from a magazine that I sent something to saying that it has been published. If anyone wants to see a photo of me in a floppy hat with a sack of potatoes on my back, go to:
Top tip – probably time to put your paddling pools away if your family are anything like mine. We perished in it at the weekend. Costumes on, sat in the damp grass. The baby went blue and my stubble stood so erect, it ripped the side of the pool.